Campin' w/ the Whole Famn-Damily

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I promise to deliver even if it is boring details of my own life.

But when it comes to camping outdoors, (as apposed to campin' at the Hilton) there are a few things that are important to remember.

1. Cleanliness: The ability to appear that you are unsoiled while living in the dirt.

I am a tent camper for the most part, unless going with my Father who drags the whole house along to the camp site. It is Glorious. I like the effort that has to be put into tent camping. I will testify that my Brother-in-law and Sister are masters of the art of camping in the dirt. They have it all and will use it as a fine example of what to do when camping. As for myself, I will serve as what not to do. (any surprise there)

Back to the cleanliness, when it come to camping in a tent you cannot have enough "Wet-Wipes" they are used from cleaning out the coffee pot to cleaning you anus after falling into the fire Saturday night with you family watching in horror. (Lesson learned, a camp-fire needs hand railing around it, I am contacting the USFS about that now.)

2. Air Mattress: n; Bladder filled with air for sleeping on. DO NOT go camping without one of these. Yeah I hear all you hard-core campers that want to be closer to the Earth, "F-off" if a higher deity wanted us to sleep on rocks and twigs why did he create plastic bladders filled with air to sleep on. For $23 bucks you can get the best sleep of your natural born life, ask my wife, I snored so load all night when I woke in the morning there was a extra cord of wood in camp.

3. Family: (essential): Group of immediate relatives, Brothers, Sister, and their significant others. These people are very important to a successful campin' trip. I mean if you go by yourself who the hell are you going to talk to, play games with, fish with, tip over a canoe with. Common' have you ever tried tip over a canoe alone? Cannot be done.

4. Food: n; sustenance, grub, groceries. When you have family around you will never have to worry about what you forgot. Bread, eggs, pepper, or alcohol. When the whole gang is about, you are covered. We had doughnuts, biscotti, scones, ribs, eggs, ham, burgers, 30 lbs of tater salad, wine, beer, whiskey, and antacid tables (Don't forget these) and chips and salsa. What more could you ask for? I guess you could ask but your sit outta luck you in the fricken woods!

5. Flashlight: Now here's a bit of technology that once the sun goes down you will be happy you have brought along (be sure to pack fresh batteries or you might fall into the fire)

What ever you do this summer, get out. Try camping, trust me you will fail the first time you go out but the memories will last you a life time.

Good Luck.

Pleasant Hill-Billy